Monday 20 December 2021

Uke-Song: "MEXICAN CLOTHING MOTHS", in the Style of Allan Sherman


Allan Sherman
1924-1973
Singable Satire
ORIGINAL SONG: "Mexican Hat Dance" (spoof) Allan Sherman, 1963. The original music, based on traditional Mexican dance-forms from the central and southern part of the country, is also known as "Jarabe Tapatío"; the music, unaccompanied by lyrics, is a typical repertoire item for mariachi.  

LIMERICK VERSE:  Two original poems composed by Giorgio Coniglio, 2017-2018, provided the fodder for these song lyrics. The verses have now been finalized and published at the OEDILF website (the Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form). They can be found more readily on the post "Limericks about Clothing Moths" on our sister blog "Edifying Nonsense".
A mariachi band
Kensington Market, Toronto
August 2018.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, August 2018. 

SONGLINK: The melody and lyrical adaptation for Mexican Hat Dance were used previously by G.C. as the base song for "Dante's 'Inferno' Canto#5a: MINOS'S TAIL TWIST".






UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT (and guitar, too!)
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at the bottom of the page.)
























ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS





















WORDPLAY LINK: 
For wordplay (palindromes, anagrams, eggcorns, creative cartography, etc.) and silly poetry (polished limericks), see our sister blog "EDIFYING NONSENSEhere.



Friday 19 November 2021

Rainy-Day Uke-Song: "VANCOUVER'S ISLE" per the Irish Rovers Band

 PARODY-LYRICS with UKULELE CHORDS

ORIGINAL SONG: "Black Velvet Band" traditional Irish pub song, as arranged by the Irish Rovers 1967. Of note, the Irish Rovers' 50th and putatively final tour took place 2 years ago, ending with concerts in Vancouver and Nanaimo BC on St. Patrick's Day.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, January, 2018. To view the lyrics without the chord-charts, proceed to our blog "Edifying Nonsense" HERE.
SONGLINK: Check out an earlier posting on this site entitled "Singable Limerick-Medley#3: A Visit to Chemainus, B.C."



Rainbow over Ladysmith Harbour
  brief break from several days of intense rain.
The IRISH ROVERS ended their 50th world
ANNIVERSARY TOUR with a concert in Nanaimo B.C
.










VANCOUVER'S ISLE


(to the tune of "Black Velvet Band")


*  A.C. = Air Canada. Westjet is a competitor on flights across the country. Porter provides more local service from Toronto Island Airport to destinations in Eastern Canada and the East Coast of the U.S. 
Chemainus: shuh-MAY-nuhs
Nanaimo: nuh-NIE-moh




























Thursday 21 October 2021

Uke-Song: "STAR-NOSED MOLE"


PARODY-LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "Heart and Soul", Frank Loesser and Hoagy Carmichael, 1938.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, February 2015.

KEYWORDS: math-science, classicsong 

Explanatory notes: The star-nosed mole inhabits wet low-lying areas of Canada and the northeastern US. It has been much less well known than its lawn-disturbing cousin, the common Eastern mole. National Geographic recently suggested that it may be the weirdest creature on the planet.


STAR-NOSED MOLE

(to the tune of "Heart and Soul")

Star-nosed mole – I fail to grasp your charms -
Fleshy snout, thick tail and flipper arms
Slit eyes,
No need to use a mirror:
You won’t be ogled by peers.
  
Star-nosed mole – a neuroscience find -
Tactile nose, hunts prey though eyes are blind
Feelers (tentacles)
Discern where kisses land,
Just like an eye or a hand.

Star-nosed mole – bolts half its weight each day
Stim-response? – Earth’s quickest, Wiki say,
Nostrils
In midst of quivering nose,
Stay underwater closed.

Strangely evolved for digging, feeding, swimming. 
How do you get to breeding, her-and-himm-ing?

So, you can ‘see'
By integrating touch,
Brain can ‘watch’- snarf yummy worms and such.
Somehow
You find cloacal holes
Of other star-nosed moles. 

Monday 20 September 2021

A Hopeful Lament: "PROSTATE CANCER"

                                                                   
PARODY-LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG"Love and Marriage", 1955, Cahn and van Heusen, performed by Frank Sinatra, also Peggy Lee and Dinah Shore.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, January 2016.

KEYWORDS: goldenoldy, medical


Humor is likely still the best medicine, even for retired physicians.

PROSTATE CANCER 

(to the tune of “Love and Marriage”: indentations at beginnings of lines flag the syncopation.) 

Strange behavior, prostate cancer
   Danger lurking down there in your pants, sir?
Age-effect? guys wondered;
So, “Yes”, you’ll have it at one hunderd.


(bridge) 
Most such tumors are just harmless 
‘Cancer in situ’ [1] 
You’ll kick can from other cause, yet 
Con...cept might befright you.

If you’ve got 10 years to squander
    These are treatment outcomes you should ponder:
No spread when detected -
Five-year survival’s not affected!

(But) Certain cancers are bad actors
   Younger age and bad genes are risk factors
Yet we’ve got the greatest,
For early pick-up: PSA-test [2]

(bridge) 
Try set frequency and onset;
Screen to detect’em.
Current guide adds DRE [3] - that’s
   .... Finger-up-rectum.

DRE and PSA-test
   If they’re worrisome you’ll face the next step
To resolve the issue
Your doc will want to get some tissue.

Cut and cure my prostate cancer?
   Ask your Uro, he’ll provide the answer.
Positive biopsy –
Might turn your life-plan turvy-topsy.    

Plan for treatment and prognosis
  That depends on what your Gleason-score [4] shows
“Six” - equivocation
You might pick watchful expectation.

(bridge)
Sigh! Why try avoid? Decide [5], if
You’ve drawn a “Seven”.
There’s no call for you to bawl
Or ....  pack bags for Heaven.

If it’s surg(e)ry, I’d subject me
   To a retropubic prostatect(o)my;
Radical excision
Routine or high-tech [6] - your decision.

Kids, I’m betting on the cure–oh!
    So I’m heading home to see my Uro
As I told your mother, 
“Four decades passed, they went by fast,
Four decades passed, let’s spend ano-o-other.” 

Readers are advised to inform themselves to the extent possible, and
then discuss the many issues involved with their health provider. Excellent online material is available at the American Cancer Society website. 

[1] cancer 'in place', which has not invaded locally or spread beyond the prostate gland.

[2] Prostate-Specific Antigen; a protein which leaks into the blood at a rate proportional to the activity of prostate cells; frequently used to help detect and monitor cancer. 
  
[3] Digital Rectal Examination by your urologist, or other doctor - not pleasant, but important.

[4] a measure of the abnormality in cell-type on either biopsy or surgical specimens, on a 10-point scale, based on the 2 most abnormal patterns found within the gland. 

[5] at this stage, treatment is usually recommended to eliminate all prostate tissue. Surgery is the more common choice, but various forms of radiation (external beam or implantation of radioactive beads) have also been used.

[6] recently, high-tech variants (laparoscopic and robotic surgery) have been developed, but their additional benefit is incompletely proven.  








HOTLINKS TO OTHER MEDICAL-THEMED SONG-POSTINGS
Prostate Cancer (see below)
...AND A FEW LIMERICK-BASED SONGS
Singable Limerick-Medley #17: Nuclear Cardiology
Singable Limerick-Medley #20: Medical Imaging


UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT


(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)


C#7 = 1112; Adim7 = 2323; F7+5 = 2110; F6 = 2213