PARODY-SONG with GUEST ARTISTS (various authors contributing limerick verses)
ORIGINAL SONG: These verses can be sung to "The Limerick Song" as in "The Flea and the Fly". See sactoGranny's recording on YouTube here.
PARODY COMPOSED: Edited by Giorgio Coniglio, June 2016.KEYWORDS: wordplay, poetry, traditional.
MOTHER EMANUEL A.M.E. WorldView
Folks visiting Charleston are weepful
Contemplating our roof and our steeple
Nine brave souls blown away.
But just trust NRA,
Who claim, "Guns don't, but people kill people".
|vigil, Charleston SC|
(This verse was written in honour of the victims of the massacre at Mother Emmanuel Church in June 2015, and in tribute to the response of the City of Charleston, S.C)
ORLANDO CAUSATION Dr Giorgio Coniglio dec
The press thought it incredibly lame -
The retracted 'fact' spewed by McCain
(Not to mention the Trump
Whose tweets honor a dump-
-ster): That Obama's 'directly' to blame.
REVERENT ASSASSINATION Bunk'n
A church-going hitman named Pluggitt
Taught young thugs this key Sten-gun nugget,
"After gun-swept pew: snug!
Wrap the corpse in a rug,
And be sure to pray after you've dug it."
TRUNCATED Schort Schrift
A world where each person is armed
Is a world where no good guy is harmed
(Sounds of automatic gun-fire) ...........
SIBLING RIBALDRY Soupbone
A duck-hunting dad from Nantucket
Stashed his ammo in daughter Nan's bucket,
'Til bad-apple son Frank
Robbed the Pawtucket bank
|American made - AR15.|
And as for Nan's bucket, Frank tucket.
ANGER'S BYSTANDERS Giorgio Coniglio
A bee and bat trapped in a bore
Could foresee what sad fate lay in store.
Said the bat, "Let it be!"
Said the bee, "No doubt that
We'll get zapped if they trigger a war!"
FAILED LEGISLATION Mrs. Konopka
The grand drama of Chris' filibuster
Brought Democrat pols to the muster
But on-stage, GOP
In their entirety*
Turned in a performance lackluster.
* an alternate version using the word 'hypocrisy' is possible, but not recommended.
EDITOR'S NOTE Giorgio Coniglio
On limerick verse, here's my slant:
Not for mannerly banter or rant
Stanzas stand to your credit;
Just be terse, aim and edit.
You can't fire off-the-mark, then recant.
(also appearing in OEDILF #95326)
HEAVY HARRY's CARRY Lime Rickey
When Harry went forth to meet Mimi
A gun filled his trousers' inseamy
But this concealed carry
Was so big for Harry
Said Mimi, "You're too glad to see me."
UNPREDICTABILITY (MONTREAL) Mickey Anderson
Big guns are akin to pit bulls
But it's guns has the trigger you pulls.
Folks can state, "By and large,
Careful owners in charge"
But their victims might call those folks, "Fools."
OPEN AGENDA Pil'
The chief of P.R. NRA,
Called for openly arming all gays.
|the frontier of belligerence|
As for bi's and transgenders,
The new weapons they'd tender
Were designed to discharge either way.
An old hunter and jester named "Rand"
Placed his shots with the best in the land,
Now he'll face this dillemer -
He's developed a tremor
And his pacing has got out of hand.
CANADIAN VIEWPOINT George O'Canuck
1). We Canucks await a yuuge migration,
From our trigger-loose neighboring nation.
When the Trump rules that land
(NRA in command)
They’ll head North for a gun-free salvation.
2). GOP will create a new order;
Gun-control – they prefer to abort ‘er.
“Where’s Cape Breton?” “Up North”.
Yanks give thanks and go forth,
Weapons-stashes must stay at the border.
3). “Make America Great Again” – stating
Mandates Second Amendment updating.
Gun sales mount; must you choose
To shoot whatever moves?
It’s a habit we find rather grating.
BUGS' EPITAPH Trooper
Elmer Fudd, no dim-sighted fanatic,
Wasn't techno- or -logically static,
"I'll ewadicate wabbits
And their wascally habits
With my gun-show semI-automatic."