Uke-Saga: "FLUORIDATION"

UKE-SAGA, a singable poem derived from lyrics of a multi-verse limerick.

MUSICAL UNDERPINNINGS: The verses of this 15-line poetic saga can be sung to "The Limerick Song", as per YouTube HERE.

ORIGINAL POETRY LYRICS: Original verses were composed by registered pseudonym Giorgio Coniglio in 2019. After undergoing their rigorous collaborative editing process, these have been published as a "brief saga", a poetic entity of three or more stanzas, on the poetry website OEDILF, the Omnificent English Dictionary In Limerick Form; they have then been displayed as poetry lyrics on our blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense". Click HERE to review Giorgio's blogged poem.

SETTING WORDS TO MUSIC: Readers might be interested to know that of more than 1000 short poems that we have published, only 50 or so would qualify, based on their format and length, as "brief sagas". Although almost any limerick verse (e.g. the "Nantucket limericks") can be set to music, we were particularly interested in exploring this transitioning for these multiverse poems that warrant the time to pick up your ukulele.

The tunes we have exploited in this effort include, not surprisingly "The Limerick Song", a vehicle we have used today. But on occasion we have also used (minor modifications may be required) the songs "Up" (Shania Twain), "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?", "The Anniversary Song", "Summertime", "We Three Kings" and "Santa Lucia".

PARODY-LINKS: We regret that to date we have no other posted songs dealing with dental issues. But you could check out Giorgio's collected series of limerick poems on another eight of these topics, collected for your convenience in "Dental Feelings", a post on our encyclopedic blog "Edifying Nonsense". AND, please bear in mind, that all of these limerick-based songs could be easily sung to the same simple tune, especially after your experience on this post with "Fluoridation". So keep ukulele, guitar, or other stringed instruments at hand, and click HERE.

first stanza:/ A preventable scourge that is florid:/ Dental caries strikes kids, and it’s horrid,/ Due to sugary diet./ “Fluoridation let’s try it./ What ensued? A debate that was torrid.

second stanza:/ Some detractors invoked a weird theory/ Every rational person would query./ “Evil Soviets try/ Via water-supply/ To poison our brains. Let/s be leery.

third stanza:/ As a child I enjoyed every treat,/ Such as kids’ breakfast cereal. Sweet!/ In old age I’ve still got/ Wits and teeth, not a lot/ But the Soviets went down in defeat.

 

WHAT NOW?

Choice #1: To leave a comment, click on the comment-'widget' at the bottom of this page (or, if that fails, find an alternate e-mail on "pages").

Choice #2: To find another song-parody, use the listings on the web-version by reverse date in the clickable 'Blog-Archive' at the top of the right-hand column.

Choice #3: To return to our broad-spectrum blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE.

Choice #4 (optional): If you found this stuff to be compellingly entertaining or educational, send a cheque/check. 

If you aren't on the 'web-version', you can get there by clicking that choice ('view web-version') at the very bottom of this blog-page!

Uke-Song: "NARY AN ELEMENT", an elegy to incomparable satirist Tom Lehrer

PARODY-LYRICS with UKULELE CHORD INDICATIONS


MUSICAL UNDERPINNINGS: "The Elements", Tom Lehrer, 1959.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, 2013. A decade later, it might be worthwhile to review these lyrics again.

Please note that T.L.'s genius has provided inspiration for a handful of other parody patter-songs; these are summarized at the bottom of this post.


EXPLANATION: Lehrer had adapted the tune from "The Major General's Song" from Gilbert and Sullivan's "Pirates of Penzance". There are 3 somewhat different melodies/chord-sequences used in alteration through the GandS song, and in Lehrer's derived spoof.

PARODY-LYRICS LINK: The lyrics for this song constituted one of Giorgio's earliest submissions to the online parody-lyrics website at AmIRight.com. 

To return to our blogsite "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE.

NARY AN ELEMENT

(to the tune of Tom Lehrer's "The Elements")

most names for elements are
 neutral Latin nouns

the Roman empire included England

  


      




 

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)

(My suggestion for the first 3 verses of the patter-list portion of this parody are shown here, but adapt them as you like! Incidentally, the Eb7 chord may look formidable to some - just use the barred version of D7 one fret higher, than slide back for the D7 that follows!)

Singable Introduction

The Patter-Song Lyrics:

Addendum #1

To [G]plural them, heads [D7]swirling them, “What [G]single rule? - please [D7]answer, Pa”.

My [G]dictum, “Don’t in[C]flict ‘em with [G]erratums [D7]or chry[G]santhema !”

Addendum #2 (optional)
There's [G]stratum, alum, [D7]allium, al[G]luvium et [D7]alia,
And [G]mom's pouch called mar[C]supium, but [G]mostly [D7]in Aus[G]tralia.

Singable Introduction:
Tom Lehrer became a legend with his scientific patter-song,
More popular and loved than his unpublished “Anti-Matter Song”;
Enhancing humdrum discourse, just to quote his ode lends elegance
To conversation thrumming with the spectrum of the Elements.

We face this glum conundrum as alumni of Philology:
Lay-folk would like a list replete with Latin etymology
The possibilities for neutral nouns in -U-M loom awesome;
No need to invoke hokum terms like tantrum or opossum, chum.

Patter-Song Lyrics:
There’s atrium, asylum, arboretum, auditorium
Compendium and modicum and rostrum, crematorium
And coliseum, quantum, condominium, euphonium
And album, acetabulum, museum, pandemonium.

There’s maximum and minimum and optimum and medium
And opium, opprobrium, colloquium and tedium
Colostrum, serum, sputum, sebum, labium, meconium
And sternum, talcum, ovum, nostrum, and spermatogonium.

Caladium, nasturtium and laburnum and geranium
And sacrum, c(a)ecum, ischium and tympanum and cranium
Consortium, memorandum, and symposium and podium
And duodenum, datum, vacuum, ultimatum, odium.

There’s pablum, perineum, paramecium, petroleum
And locum and inoculum, lyceum and linoleum
And tritium, deuterium, trapezium and trillium
Mycelium, flagellum, endothelium and cilium.

There’s quorum and decorum, mausoleum, moratorium
And premium, per-annum, honorarium, emporium
And pendulum and forum, fulcrum, speculum, bacterium
And cerebellum, plenum, sum, curriculum, delirium.

Gymnasium and stadium and magnum and terrarium
Solarium, momentum, myocardium, aquarium
And scrotum and factotum and postpartum and continuum
And spectrum, referendum, rectum and … (What’s left?) residuum.

Addendum #1
To plural them, heads swirling them, “What single rule? — please answer, Pa”.
My dictum, “Don’t inflict ’em with erratums or chrysanthema !”

ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS
Click on any chord chart to enlarge and enter thumbnail mode (the slides for both the parody and the original versions can then be enlarged and viewed in any order). 
Readers are asked to honour the original artists' creativity, and to use the slides of the original song-lyrics only to ensure familiarity with the suggested style for the spoof version. 

You crave more patter-songs in the style of Tom Lehrer???
T.L. inspired a whole platterful of songs related to our interest in (i) grammatically paired words, including binomials and reduplications, and (ii) Latin loanwords. And, you should have your foot in the door, having mastered the complexities of singing and playing our above offering "Alliterative Binomials".  So, enjoy singing and playing these as well !!!     
1a. "Alliterative Binomials, part#1"

1b. "Alliterative Binomials, part#2"

2a. "Rhyming Binomials, part#1"

2b. "Rhyming Binomials, part#2"

3.  "A Lesson about Reduplications" (not a patter-song)

4a. "Reduplications, part#1"

4b. "Reduplications, part#2",

5.  ("No Elements", 3rd declension Latin nouns)

6.  "The Uniqueness of Nuclear", Latin adjectival listing

of the original songs in our parody suite about word-pairs,
7/9 pay tribute to the work of Tom Lehrer

WHAT NOW?

Choice #1: To leave a comment, click on the comment-'widget' at the bottom of this page (or, if that fails, find an alternate e-mail on "pages").

Choice #2: To find another song-parody, use the listings on the web-version by reverse date in the clickable 'Blog-Archive' at the top of the right-hand column.

Choice #3: To return to our broad-spectrum blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE.

Choice #4 (optional): If you found this stuff to be compellingly entertaining or educational, send a cheque/check. 

If you aren't on the 'web-version', you can get there by clicking that choice ('view web-version') at the very bottom of this blog-page!

Related Palindromes:  (Latin examples found at Auxilium: Palindroma) 

There seem to be no published examples of phrases based on the  neutral nouns !!! 

Ave, Eva.  (Hail, Eve !)

Sum summus mus. (I am the top mouse)

Et tiger non regit te.  (And the tiger doesn't rule thee).

Aures serua.  (Safeguard your ears).

Sator Arepo Tenet Opera Rotas. (The famous  "Sator Square" - can be read either horizontally or vertically)  

Roma tibi subito motibus ibit amor. (In Rome, love will go to you suddenly)

 few English words ending in -UM
 are not of Latin origin

Children's Uke-Song: "ARE YOUR ETHICS LOW?"

 

SONG with UKULELE CHORDS

MUSICAL UNDERPINNINGS: "Do Your Ears Hang Low?", around 1900, likely a sanitized version of a bawdy, nonsensical campfire song, with some similarity to "Turkey in the Straw". The tune is now most familiar as a children's novelty song, as performed by Sharon, Lois and Bram, and others. (Check out their You-tubed version HERE.)

PARODY COMPOSED: Stimulated by various discussions of presidential preoccupations as discussed recently by the media, Giorgio Coniglio wrote these lyrics in July, 2025. Further explanatory notes (or verses) may be added as the situation evolves further. 

  To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense"  click HERE. 

SONGLINK: Fans of Sharon, Lois and Bram, the iconic Canadian children's song-monstrels, will be pleased to find another spoof inspired by their work  HERE.   

                                                        

                     

* Department of Justice (US)

** make America great again, slogan for the loosely defined Trump-controlled  Republican Party 

Are your ethics low, unlike Kamala and Joe?
The DOJ* 's got photo-pics and piles of video. 
If released, corroboration could cause MAGA** consternation -- ,
Drive poll-ratings low.

Are your standards low? Friendly pedophiles you know
Have bestowed conspiring theorists with rumors that will flow -- 
MAGA-loyalists hoped Dems would crowd Jeff's "list", and steal the show. 
Are your ethics low? 

Are your moral precepts low? Nasty pederasts you know
Seen in birthday cards and photo-files and piles of video.
At some parties you were host; bimbos aged eighteen at most. 
Are your standards low?

Are your moral standards low? It's "fake news", we hear you crow:
"Files concocted by James Comey, and Hillary and Joe."
|So get Congress dismissed early, and avoid the hurly-burly.
Aren't your precepts low?

ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS
Click on any chord chart to enlarge and enter thumbnail mode (the slides for both the parody and the original versions can then be enlarged and viewed in any order). 
Readers are asked to honour the original artists' creativity, and to use the slides of the original song-lyrics only to ensure familiarity with the suggested style for the spoof version. 

WHAT NOW?
Choice #1: To leave a comment, click on the comment-'widget' at the bottom of this page (or, if that fails, find an alternate e-mail on "pages").

Choice #2: To find another song-parody, use the listings on the web-version by reverse date in the clickable 'Blog-Archive' at the top of the right-hand column.

Choice #3: To return to our broad-spectrum blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE.

Choice #4 (optional): If you found this stuff to be compellingly entertaining or educational, send a cheque/check. 

If you aren't on the 'web-version', you can get there by clicking that choice ('view web-version') at the very bottom of this blog-page!

Yiddish Uke-Nostalgia: "SKITTISH DOLL"

PARODY LYRICS with UKULELE CHORDS

MUSICAL UNDERPINNINGS: "Satin Doll" -- Music written in 1953 by Duke Ellington and Billy Strayhorn, lyrics composed years later by Johnny Mercer. Recorded by Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra, Sammy Davis Jr., etc. The second verse of the original lyrics contain the words ... "Speaks Latin, my Satin Doll."
So, could it hurt if she spoke Yiddish?  

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, 2020

To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", for some further recommendations about this song (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE.

Couple dancing at their son's Bar Mitzvah party in 1958.

SKITTISH DOLL      

(to the tune of "Satin Doll") 

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT (also banjo, mandolin, guitar etc.!)

(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)

Specifics for C-tuned ukulele:
Gm7 = Bb6= 0211;  Am7 = 0000, or 0030;  G9 = 2212;  Gb9 = 1101; Gb7 = x101; Cm7 = 3333; BbM7 = 3210.  

 

Prospects for Bar Mitzvah celebrations during the 50s.

ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS
Click on any chord chart to enlarge and enter thumbnail mode (the slides for both the parody and the original versions can then be enlarged and viewed in any order). 
Readers are asked to honour the original artists' creativity, and to use the slides of the original song-lyrics only to ensure familiarity with the suggested style for the spoof version. 

Chicken soup served with gold ladles,
Live band, ice sculpture, sweet tables;
Speaks Yiddish, my skittish doll.

Cousin's Bar Mitzvah, ... wire lift dress,
Built kind of zaftig -- a 'princess',
Speaks Yiddish, my skittish doll.

Uncle Seymour is right:
When I'm near, she's uptight as can be;
Cause she's noticed me drool
And she ain't cool 'bout fooling with me
(kenahora!).

After the dinner, candle lighting,
Alone in the corner, looks inviting,
Fingers wander, but that is all.
Slaps hand back, my skittish doll.
Can't mess with ... my skittish doll.

WHAT NOW?

Choice #1: To leave a comment, click on the comment-'widget' at the bottom of this page (or, if that fails, find an alternate e-mail on "pages").

Choice #2: To find another song-parody, use the listings on the web-version by reverse date in the clickable 'Blog-Archive' at the top of the right-hand column.

Choice #3: To return to our broad-spectrum blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE.

Choice #4 (optional): If you found this stuff to be compellingly entertaining or educational, send a cheque/check. 

If you aren't on the 'web-version', you can get there by clicking that choice ('view web-version') at the very bottom of this blog-page!