o) Uke-Song: "NO ELEMENTS", an elegy to incomparable satirist Tom Lehrer

PARODY-LYRICS


ORIGINAL SONG: "The Elements", Tom Lehrer, 1959.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, 2013. A decade later, it might be worthwhile to review these once more.

Please note that T.L.'s genius has provided inspiration for a handful of other parody patter-songs; these are summarized at the bottom of this post.


EXPLANATION: Lehrer had adapted the tune from "The Major General's Song" from Gilbert and Sullivan's "Pirates of Penzance". There are 3 somewhat different melodies/chord-sequences used in alteration through the GandS song, and in Lehrer's derived take-off.

PARODY-LYRICS LINK: The lyrics for this song constituted one of Giorgio's earliest submissions to the online parody-lyrics website at AmIRight.com. And, should you prefer, they are also displayed without the chord-indications on our blogsite "Daily Illustrated Nonsense"; click HERE.

NO ELEMENTS

(to the tune of "The Elements")

A famous building in Rome

Most names for elements are
 neutral Latin nouns

Roman empire included England

  


      




 

Singable Introduction

The Patter-Song Lyrics:

There’s [G]pablum, perineum, paramecium, petroleum

And [D7]locum and inoculum, lyceum and linoleum

A few English words ending in -UM
 are not of Latin origin

And [G]tritium, deuterium, trapezium and trillium
My[D]celium, flagellum, endo[A7]thelium and [D]cilium.

There’s [D7]quorum and decorum, mausoleum, mora[Gm]torium

And [F7]premium, per-annum, honorarium, em[Bb]porium

And [D7]pendulum and forum, fulcrum, speculum, bac[Gm]terium

And [Eb7]cerebellum, plenum, sum, curriculum, de[D7]lirium.

Gym[G]nasium and stadium and magnum and terrarium

So[D7]larium, momentum, myocardium, aquarium

And [G]scrotum and fac[D7]totum and post[G]partum and con[D7]tinuum

And [G]duodenum, [C]referendum, [G]rectum [D7]and re[G]siduum.

Addendum #1
There's [G]stratum, alum, [D7]allium, al[G]luvium et [D7]alia,
And [G]mom's pouch called mar[C]supium, but [G]mostly [D7]in Aus[G]tralia.

Addendum #2

To [G]plural them, heads [D7]swirling them, “What [G]single rule? - please [D7]answer, Pa”.

My [G]dictum, “Don’t in[C]flict ‘em with [G]erratums [D7]or chry[G]santhema !” 

et cetera!

(My suggestion for the first 3 verses of the patter-list portion of this parody are shown here, but adapt them as you like! Incidentally, the Eb7 chord may look formidable to some - just use the barred version of D7 one fret higher, than slide back for the D7 that follows!)

You crave more patter-songs in the style of Tom Lehrer???
T.L. inspired a significant platterful of songs related to our interest in grammatically paired words, including binomials and reduplications. And, you should have your foot in the door, having mastered the complexities of singing and playing our above offering "No Elements".  So, enjoy trying these as well !!!     
1a. "Alliterative Binomials, part#1"

1b. "Alliterative Binomials, part#2"

2a. "Rhyming Binomials, part#1"

2b. "Rhyming Binomials, part#2"

3.  "A Lesson about Reduplications" (not a patter-song)

4a. "Reduplications, part#1"

4b. "Reduplications, part#2",

5.  "The Uniqueness of Nuclear", Latin adjectival listing, scheduled for April 2024.

Related Palindromes:  (Latin examples found at Auxilium: Palindroma) 

There seem to be no published examples of phrases based on the  neutral nouns !!! 

Ave, Eva.  (Hail, Eve !)

Sum summus mus. (I am the top mouse)

Et tiger non regit te.  (And the tiger doesn't rule thee).

Aures serua.  (Safeguard your ears).

Sator Arepo Tenet Opera Rotas. (The famous  "Sator Square" - can be read either horizontally or vertically)  

Roma tibi subito motibus ibit amor. (In Rome, love will go to you suddenly)

s, o) Children's Uke-Song: ""ARE YOUR ETHICS LOW?"

 

SONG with UKULELE CHORDS

ORIGINAL SONG: "You can listen to the Trio's well-known version on YouTube HERE, 
 

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, August 2018.  To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense" (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE. 

SONGLINKS:

ARE YOUR PRECEPTS LOW?

 (to the tune of "Do your Ears Hang Low?")

                                                                        

Are your precepts low, unlike Kamala and Joe?

The DOJ* 's got photo-pics and piles of video. 

If released, corroboration could cause MAGA** consternation -- ,

Drive poll-ratings low.

Are your standards low? Friendly pedophiles you know

Have bestowed conspiring theorists with rumors that will flow -- 

MAGA-loyalists hoped Dems would crowd Jeff's "list", and steal the show. 

Are your ethics low?   

Are your moral precepts low? Nasty pederasts you know

Seen in birthday cards and photo-files and piles of video. 

At some parties you were host; bimbos aged eighteen at most.  

Are your standards low?

Are your moral standards low? It's "fake news", we hear you crow: 

"Files concocted by James Comey, and Hillary and Joe."  

So get Congress dismissed early, and avoid the hurly-burly.

Aren't your standards low?

* Department of Justice (US)

** make America great again, slogan for the loosely defined Trump-controlled  Republican Party 

ORIGINAL SONG-LYRICS

Click directly on any slide to view the thumbnails at the bottom of the page.  You can then use them to easily go back and forth between the parody-version and the original lyrics.

o) French Plural Uke-Song: "MAUX-DE-TEXTE", headachy lyricx

PARODY-LYRICS,  see also the previous posts on this blog:

"Ewe-Yew-You", "Jeux-de-Mots", and "Jeux-de-Mots, Encore".

ORIGINAL SONG: "Do-Re-Mi", Rodgers and Hammerstein 1959, performed by Julie Andrews and the cast of "The Sound of Music".

French Version of the Musical

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, December 2014.

PARODY-LYRICS LINK: To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense" (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE. 

MAUX-DE-TEXTE

 (to the tune of "Do-Re-Mi")

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT

Yiddish Uke-Nostalgia: "SKITTISH DOLL"

PARODY LYRICS

ORIGINAL SONG: "Satin Doll" -- Music written in 1953 by Duke Ellington and Billy Strayhorn, lyrics composed years later by Johnny Mercer. Recorded by Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra, Sammy Davis Jr., etc. The second verse of the original lyrics contain the words ... "Speaks Latin, my Satin Doll."
So, could it hurt if she spoke Yiddish?  

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, July 2017.

To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", for some further recommendations about this song (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE.

Couple dancing at their son's Bar Mitzvah party in 1958.

SKITTISH DOLL      

(to the tune of "Satin Doll") 

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT

 (Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)

Prospects for Bar Mitzvah celebrations during the 50s.

o) Uke-Song: "R-I-C-E" (rest, ice, compression, elevation) -- a seniors' sports injury ballad

PARODY-LYRICS
ORIGINAL SONG: "YMCA", Village People, 1978.
PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, April 2014.

PARODY-LYRICS LINK: To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense" (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE. 
(You can also view the lyrics and commentary (without images or chords, at the  parody-lyrics site where they were originally posted online)  at AmIRight.com Post"R-I-C-E"

RICE is a mnemonic for 4 elements used to treat soft-tissue and other injuries.



R-I-C-E            
          

(to the tune of "Y-M-C-A")

UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)

HOTLINKS TO OTHER MEDICAL-THEMED SONG-POSTINGS

Adenoma

Avitaminoses 

As We Nuke It

Flaking Out is What They Do

Mel and His Hernia

Mergerwocky

Off-Patent Drug#19

Prostate Cancer

Reflux Romp

R-I-C-E (see below)

The Uniqueness of Nuclear

The Valgus and the Carbuncle

Under My Own Steam part#1

Under My Own Steam part#2

Where Has Neurosyphylis Gone?

...AND A FEW LIMERICK-BASED SONGS

Singable Limerick-Medley #17: Nuclear Cardiology

Singable Limerick-Medley #20: Medical Imaging

o) Historical Uke-Song: "THE PRATTLE OF NEW ORLEANS" -- reprise of the War of 1812

PARODY-LYRICS

ORIGINAL SONG: "The Battle of New Orleans" Jimmy Driftwood 1958; popular cover by Johnny Horton, 1959

The United States 1812-1815

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, February, 2013.

PARODY-LYRICS LINK: To return to the corresponding post on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense" (and to see the lyrics without the chord-chart indications) click HERE. 
(You can also view the lyrics and commentary (without images or chords, at the  parody-lyrics site where they were originally posted online)  at  AmIRight.com Post "The Prattle of New Orleans"

Jimmy Driftwood with 
his signature home-made guitar

The original recording

Battle-site map

Andrew Jackson (Old Hickory)
 leading troops to victory

THE PRATTLE OF NEW ORLEANS

(to the tune of "The Battle of New Orleans")

As a hist’ry buff, I thought that I should delve,

Into some stated details ‘bout the War of 1812.

’Cause before the BP oil-spill and the Storm they called Katrin’,

Was a diff’rent kind of battle near the Town of New Orleans.

Hup 2,3,4; Hup 2,3,4

I’d heard of Laura Secord, and the White House getting torched,

And a bit of British Caribbean forces getting zorched.

I checked it with my Southern spouse, her knowledge too was pale,

But we both knew Jimmy Driftwood’s folksy song could tell the tale.

We knew by heart the Johnny Horton version,

With the poor alligator that got used as cannon-bore:

It topped the charts over here as well as Britain,

Though it clearly smudged the history and magnified the lore.

Was Old Hick’ry drinkin’ buds with Jean Laffitte?

And why’d the British bring along so many drums to beat?

And who’d believe the dyin’ words of General Pakenham

Were “you better quit a-foolin’ with your cousin Uncle Sam”?

Did seasoned soldiers turn and do the rabbit-run,

When confronted with militia who were firing squirrel-guns?

So I took a couple Beanos, then I snarfed on nacho-chips,

And I googled “Town of New Orleans and British fighting ships”.

 It seems…

The Brits had occupied the west bank Mississip’,

Fog lifted, they got blasted sneakin’ over in their ships,

More leaders killed and wounded as they tried to storm the Town,

So their troops were not a-runnin’, they just stood and got mowed down.

Weeks thence, per Wikiped’ in Feb’ 1815,

The English, reassembled, sailed out east from New Orleans,

They targeted more mischief ’long the coast of Alabam’

(In the hold the rum-packed body of their Gen’ral Pakenham).

They left Mobile standing when the orders finally reached ’em,

“No territory changing, just return to status quo”,

On Christmas Eve belligerents had penned the Ghent treaty,

So the Indies Fleet sailed home across the Gulf of Mexico.

This strange War that began with maritime embargoes

Seemed a drawn-out pointless offshoot of Napoleonic woes;

If “agreed on as a triumph” on the two sides of the border,

It’s the writing and the citing and the singing makes it so !

Hup 2,3,4 x2. Sound off 3,4 x2.....

Enjoy chord-charts and lyrics at the Corktown Ukulele Jam songbook (Parody section at end): Corktunes: The Prattle of New Orleans


To play the original song- The Battle of New Orleans, Johnny Horton version, check out Corktunes, the songbook of the Corktown Ukulele Jam here

HOTLINKS TO OTHER CANADIAN-THEMED SONG-POSTINGS

An Alien Heading South

Big Rob Rehab Clinic

Canadian Reunion

Canoeing Lesson

I've Got Anagrams, Eh?

Flight of the Loonie

FOP-Shop Wine

Mergerwocky

Off-Patent Drug #19

Prattle of New Orleans (see below)

Suburbs' Guy

The Maple Leaf Ad Infinitum 

This Land Has Anagrams 

TTC Voices

Vancouver's Isle

..AND A FEW LIMERICK-BASED SONGS

Shania Twain's "Verse": An anthem for limericists

Canada Day 2015 (singable limericks)
Limericks About Chemainus, B.C.


UKULELE-FRIENDLY FORMAT
(Click on any chord-chart slide to move to 'song-presentation mode'; then navigate through thumbnails at bottom of page.)